WATCH YOUR LANGUAGE!

We're quite formal here in Poland. You say good day to everyone except priests and other Catholic clergy, where the usual greeting is, "May God make you happy". When you say goodbye to the priest etc, you say, "z Bogem - with God."

My first lesson in Poland, for me as well as my students, was at a large business where I was to teach the chairman, some of his senior staff, and some of the junior staff too. The first class was middle management, and a man about 40 years old, let's call him Waldek, asked me if I spoke any Polish. When I told him I knew only Dzień dobry - good day - his face lit up.

"Ah," he said, "That's fine for ordinary people, but when you are speaking to someone important, you must say, "O Kurwa! For example, if it's a policeman, or a priest, or a bishop, or especially if it's Mr Nowak, the chairman, you must say, 'O kurwa, Mr Nowak."

There was somethng in his eyes, and the others had it too, that said - 'Be careful!' After the lesson, I checked in the dictionary.

'Kurwa' means prostitute, but the Poles use it as English speakers use 'f***'.

Next lesson with Waldek, I told him I had greeted Mr Nowak with, "O kurwa!"

Waldek's face dropped. "You didn't! What did he say?"

"He asked me why I, a mere guest in Poland, chose to insult him at our first meeting, and so I told him I was only doing what you told me to."

Waldek looked sick. He has a wife and children to support, so I couldn't watch him suffer any longer.

Beware!