Monday, February 25, 2013

The Fruits of Vatican II

From Bogus Smirk, who claims he wrote this in minutes. Sometimes I worry about him....

Into the fields to harvest
The fruits of Vatican II!
We are the Easter People
Who will the Church renew.
"What are these fruits," you ponder,
"That you so keenly reap?"
We've Joy and Love and Wonder, so
Let Faith and Reason sleep!

There were no fruits from doctrine
Or from obedience blind,
But we are now so fruity,
It sometimes blows our mind.
We speak in tongues and prophesy
"Yah! Bliffer Blaffer Bloo!"
The Spirit so baptises us,
That all we say is true.

We don't need popes and bishops
We've each got Direct Lines
To our heavenly Big Daddy,
So we are all divines.
When Roma loquitur, we know
Causa is not at end
We might accept Rome's opinion
If it matches the latest trend.

The Fathers of the Council
Said, "From the experts, seek
The wisdom of the worldly
The freedom of the freak!"
We've done it:  See how worldly
And freaky are we all!
At every Mass there's schmalz and slop -
Don't we just have a ball!

Oh let the Rhinish water
Into the Tiber flow,
And Luther's vermicular food
On us his strength bestow.
Huss, Henry VIII, Barth, Nietzche, Pan,
Mohammed, Buddha, Kung
They offer us their treasures -
Let us their glories tongue.

That lovely lady Brosselmans
Said Mass is like Diwali
Or Eid ul Fatr festival -
That's really up our alley.
Our Mass is a complete shebang
With loud and joyful praise.
Who needs old-fashioned reverence
When we our voices raise

In Gibberish and rigmarole,
"Oh wazza wazza whizz!"
And pogo up and down the aisle
While the celebrant does his biz.
Oh sweet to the Ears of Abba dear
Is our loud hullabaloo,
A glorious Harvest Home for us,
We fruits of Vatican II!

(Tune: We Plough the Fields and Scatter"

3 comments:

Richard Collins said...

Quite brilliant Chris, thank you. God bless.

ignorant redneck said...

What have you done?!?

Someone, somewhere will read this, then copy it, then sing it in their parish, inflicting it on all the long sufering Beadsqueezers who have no other place to go to Mass because of the priest shortage!

Left-footer said...

Richard - not my work, but that of "Il miglior fabbro" (to quote Dante) - Smirk! I will apprise him of your kind comment.

I.R. - I'm sorry, but such awesome talent as Smirk's cannot lie hidden!