On being a gentleman

I have an excellent memory, and this story is true, perhaps word for word.

In 1962, in the suggestions book in the library at New College, a undergraduate request appeared for the works of Nietsche in English. The Librarian, Harry Bell, wrote that they would be ordered.

The next request, from another undergraduate, was for the works of Flaubert in English. This was refused.

The man who wrote the second request asked why. Was the Librarian an anti-French racist?

"Quite the reverse." wrote Harry Bell, "Every gentleman should be expected to read French. No gentleman can be expected to understand German. "

Loathsome, bigoted racist Harry Bell! (irony here) May God rest his soul.

In those days, at Oxford and perhaps Cambridge, the idea, if not the practice, of being a gentleman was still very much alive. Letters came addressed to one by name, with Esq appended. There were none addressed to Mr.

In Poland Pan and Pani , lord and lady are the normal forms of address, and only in Spain and amongst Somalis have I met with such a naturally aristocratic, in the best sense, people.

In my first week here I was walking to Mass when I saw, lying at the side of the road under his bicycle, an oldish man holding a vodka bottle.

I walked over to where he lay, and asked, "Czy mogę pana pomóć?" (Can I help the lord?)

"Nie, dziekuję, panu. Wszystko porządku. Proszę." (No, thank you, Sir. Everything's in order. Please have a drink.) and he proffered the half-full bottle. A gentleman to the core.