Thought for the Day.

If or when they come to 'euthanase' me, I hope I shall have the strength to 'kakothanase' them.

Amateur Dentistry, an Enjoyable Hobby

Just to be perfectly clear about it, if anyone ever proposes euthanasia or assisted suicide to me, I trust that my remaining strength will be sufficient to so punch them in the teeth that their subsequent dental ablutions will have to be executed at the other end of their digestive tract.

Rash Promises

Remembering an excellent film I saw years ago, in which a Polish aristocrat engaged in one of the wars with the Turks, with great chivalry, but dubious theology, politely declined the amorous hospitality of a lady on the grounds that he had promised the Mother of God that he would abstain from such until he had decapitated three Turks with one slash of his sabre, which act of martial prowess he had so far failed to accomplish, I declare:

That I am not and am unlikely ever to be, in possession of a firearm.

That I do have a large and admirably sharp axe, for cutting firewood.

That should the foul emissaries of the Lifetime Options Directorate (as yet, a figment of my inflamed imagination, but coming soon) or its squalid successors ever find me with the intention of subjecting me to 'euthanasia', I will do my utmost to subject them to cacothanasia.

I do not trust my eye for decapitation enough to swipe off three heads at a stroke, but I will, as my strength allows, make a bloody mess of as many of them as possible.

Think on't.

Euthanasia in the U.K. as no doubt you had guessed

A Brief Encounter has a frightening post today about the "Liverpool Care Pathway". It is well worth reading, and then following the link to the Daily Telegraph report.

It seems that medical practitioners, nurses, whoever, are deciding who should die, when, and how.

How long before the Lifetime Options Directorate becomes a reality?

An LOD Inspector Calls - and is Made Mincemeat Of

It is eight o'clock on a Sunday evening at the house of Mr and Mrs Innocenti, somewhere in rural England. In a comfortable, not very tidy room, the Innocentis, who are probably in their seventies, are playing Blue Monk (listen to the original here) by Thelonious Monk, he on alto saxophone, she on piano. A bottle of Jack Daniels stands on top of the piano. There is a crucifix on the wall. The doorbell rings.

Mrs I: I'll go! You can change your reed. 

[exit. Returns with a man and a woman. He is aged about 40, with no hair, a rather low-cut t-shirt, shorts, knee-socks, and big suede boots. He is carrying a clipboard. The woman is also about 40 years old, tall, with short hair, glasses, a permanent thin-lipped beatific smile, and is dressed in baggy denims and Mongolian tractor-tyre sandals. She carries a fat briefcase.]

Petronella Gaskammer: Good evening. Mr and Ms Innocenti?

Mr I: And who the bloody hell are you pair of freaks?

PG: Mr Innocenti. Swearing and personal insults are unacceptable. Do not speak to us like that. I am Inspector Petronella Gaskammer, and my colleague is Mr Dwane Totenlager. We are from LOD, the Lifetime Options Directorate. Have you heard of LOD, Ms Innocenti?

Mrs I: The euthanasia gang? Get out! We're busy. And I'm Mrs, not Ms, you dingy, rebarbative baggage.

DT: Ms Innocenti (or can I call you Maria?) we are here to help.

MrI: No you may bloody not! You and your grotesque sidekick can get your repulsive selves out of here now.....

PG If you persist in being disruptive and abusive, this meeting cannot continue. You are both senior citizens occupying a very large house with five bedrooms and a very big garden..

Mrs I: Which is ours, paid for years ago out of our hard work.

PG: Of course, but there are other families who need accomodation, Maria, and they need it more than you do.

DT: And your medical records (reads from clipboard) show that you, Peter Innocenti, are suffering from prostate cancer as well as degeneration of two prosthetic hips, while Maria has had three operations for ...

Mrs I: And what makes that your business?

PG: It is our job to help people make the right end-of-life decisions. We are both trained counsellors. We are here to explain the options you have.

If you choose euthanasia now, your five children will inherit your home, which is worth over a million pounds, without inheritance tax or capital gains tax. Your cremation and multi-faith funeral will be at the state's expense, and you will have the satisfaction of helping your family, relieving them and the state of the burden of looking after you, and enabling the large pensions you both receive..

Mrs I: Which we paid for...

DT: To be spent on projects and enterprises for the Common Good.

Mr I: And if we don't choose to be put down?

PG: Then your home will be subject to a compulsory purchase order. The price, taking into account your ages, both nearly eighty, will be reduced actuarily to about fifty thousand pounds. You will be rehoused in a Seniors' Facility. You will not, once you have made your decision, be entitled to any free medical treatment, other than euthanasia at such time as our medical experts deem fit, usually on your 85th birthdays. Perhaps you would like to make a cup of tea and consider your decision.

DT: But please don't take too long. We have two more calls to make.

Mr I: [to Mrs I] You'd better sit down, my love, and think about it. I'll make us a coffee. [exit to kitchen. Sounds of kettles etc.]

DT: It's quite painless you know, and think how much better life will be for your family. The facility is waiting outside.

[A minute passes. Sounds from kitchen. Mr Innocenti returns carrying a chainsaw.]

Mr I: Damn you both to Hell! [He starts the chainsaw and makes shrieking mincemeat of the LOD personnel.]

I would like to have finished by saying that the Innocentis were rescued after their heroic last stand, but I fear that in the insane and bleak future which we face, there will be no rescue. 

God help us!

LIFESPAN CHOICES

In case you missed it, do please follow the link at the end of this post to The Catholic Herald.

I have never read anything written by Pratchett, and see no reason to do so. Fantasy is not my glass of Jack Daniels.

I am even less interested in his views on the morality of suicide. If he wants to kill himself, so be it. However there now seems to be a BBC/Dimbleby-backed voluntary euthanasia movement, which if successful, will be followed by a Lifespan Choices curriculum in schools, followed by pressure to die when ones life is no longer deemed useful to the Big Society.

BEWARE!

I fear liberal, compassionate legislation. We know it by its stench: the abortion act, the legislation designed to promote homosexualism, the filthy sex-instuction programme in schools.

Its supporters would have sent Blessed John Paul II to the death chamber long before his natural and holy passing.

 Timeo et odi Onanos et dona ferentes.

http://www.catholicherald.co.uk/commentandblogs/2011/06/14/the-bbc-is-drip-feeding-assisted-dying-propaganda-into-our-living-rooms/

The Common Good

We are lone individuals. As Matthew Arnold wrote,

"Between us lies
"The unplumbbed, salt, estranging sea."

and as Kipling said,
“For the sins that ye sin by two, by two
Ye shall pay for, one by one.”

And yet we seem to yearn for the common good. Individualism is, we are told, a bad thing, and the common good is paramount. So how about a moral litmus test? Do you agree with the following as "common good" propositions?

Please try to avoid using common sense.

1 There are too many people in the world, so contraception and abortion are good things.
2 Treating the terminally ill wastes resources which could be better used elsewhere. Therefore some form of euthanasia is a good thing.
3 My car pollutes our environment, so I must walk, cycle, or use public transport.
4 Religion is good if it promotes social cohesion.
5 Religion, if taken to extremes, does not promote social cohesion, so it is bad.
6 Public display of religious symbols does not promote social cohesion, so it is bad.
7 Excellence breeds envy and discontent, so it is bad.
8 Clever children should not be taught with other clever children, and by clever teachers, as this is divisive. Mixed ability schools and classes should be the norm. Difficult subjects should not be taught because they are divisive.
9 Sex makes people happy, so the more the better.
10 ‘Deep’ ecology, which values all life equally is a very good thing.

And one for luck: The Pope and the Church need to be 100% inclusive.

I think you can guess my position, but your comments would be greatly appreciated.