In an Ecumenical Spirit

In my current ecumenical spirit, I have given space on another page of my blog to the rantings of Bishop Bogus Smirk, whose page bears the title 'The Ever-Changing Truth".

He is now complaining that no one reads it, so I reproduce his latest piece here. He has produced a video, but characteristically, it doesn't seem to work, so we must make do with this transcript.

GLASTONBURGESI, ORBI, ET PAPAE

TO GLASTONBURY, THE WORLD AND THE POPE


(Opening fanfare of didgeridoos. Camera pans over Glastonbury, cuts to Pope on balcony, pans to group of White Anglo-Saxon women dancing brokenly and angrily around a huge pile of burning wimples. Pans to balcony, on which stands Bishop.)

He speaks.

To Glastonbury - peace, melllow moods, fragrant vapours rising to the heavens from spliff and bong! Happy mushrooming.

To the world - see above.

To Pope Benedict the 16th: be humble. You have much to learn.

Learn, as Tony Blair said a few years ago, to LISTEN.

LISTEN to the people in the pews.

LISTEN to the brokeness and angryness in you own church.

You're OUT OF TOUCH!

Tony Blair, now there's a man to respect and listen to!

For starters, he's a real English gentleman, born with a silver spoon in his mouth, speaks with a proper Oxford accent, not like that Brown, eh?

TONY BLAIR IS A DEEPLY HUMBLE AND RELIGIOUS MAN WHO SAYS IT AS IT IS.

He's also got a brain and a half - he must have. HE'S LOADED!

And he CARES. For BROKENESS, for ANGRYNESS.

He cares for all the unheard people in the Catholic Church, the gays, biseuals, transgenders, lesbians, ordinary people like you and I.

He told you straight, did Tone, that you were out of touch with ordinary people pewsitters, whatever.

He said you should LISTEN to THEM and HIM.

SO LISTEN!

Move on from your obsessions with condoms, abortion, sex, doctrine, theology (don't talk to me about theology), and embrace LIFE with all its DIVERSITY.

WE ARE BROKEN!

WE ARE ANGERED!!

WE ARE CHURCH!!!

(Fade-out broken, angry wailing.)